Narcissism

narcissism (noun) : a psychological condition characterized by self-preoccupation, lack of empathy, and unconscious deficits in self-esteem; see also, narcissist (better known as my mother, my ex-husband, an inordinate number of my female friends)
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But enough about me!

The real news is that narcissistic personality disorder (characterized by an inflated sense of self-importance and the need for constant attention) has been eliminated from the upcoming revision of the DSM.

see: www.nytimes.com/2010/11/30/health/views/30mind.html

Critics of course are concerned over how a treatment plan will be implemented if narcissism is removed as a personality disorder. Speaking from my own experience, I have yet to meet a narcissist who has changed, therapy or no therapy, and become less self-centered and more empathetic. So should we even care about them?

I think that since there's now room in the DSM for new personality disorders, how about one for those enabling all the narcissists out there? Because if therapy can help the enablers then the narcissists will be left to deal with each other, right?

And picking up on the whole 'daydream believer' melodyfest, maybe then the world will be a better place.

Daydream

daydream (noun) : the 24-hour period available for musing about the fulfillment of wishes rather than working on fulfilling them
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A daydream is a type of imagining, but when the dreamer begins to confuse the dreams with reality, it's called hallucinating. Which is why, I suppose, psychologists in the 1960s provided strategies to combat daydreams similar to those used in combating drug use. And Dr. Freud believed that only unfulfilled people created fantasies and that daydreaming was an early sign of mental illness.

Thankfully, by the late 1980s, psychologists considered daydreams a natural component of the mental process. Thus we dreamers are saved - at least this time - from the label "mental illness."

In daydreams, we form a mental image of a past experience or of a situation that we haven't actually experienced to escape from reality temporarily or to overcome a frustrating situation or to satisfy a hidden wish. My particular favourite (and I don't think I'm alone here) is the one about me winning the lottery. Daydreaming usually isn't harmful, unless it interferes with daily living. That means I can fantasize about what I'd do with my vast winnings as long as I continue to work.

And, as Shakespeare points out, there's the rub for all of us daydream believers.

DSM

DSM (noun) : 1. Distinguished Service Medal given to those mental health professionals who diagnose mental disorders; 2. the non-religious 'good book' referencing those mental disorders
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Apparently, the clinical usefulness of the DSM is more than a tool for making diagnoses - it´s a guide for communicating about mental health conditions. So when two clinicians discuss a diagnosis such as "major depressive disorder, single episode, severe with psychotic features," they both have the same visualization of the illness.

Categorizing conditions or disorders that people have helps with avoiding labels and further conditions. That means that while I may have suffered with depression, I was never a manic (or other kind of) depressive and therefore was able to eliminate or cure the depression with the help of my therapist (who, by the way, has been bugging me to say something nice about him in this blog; consider it done, dude). As with most therapy-like items, there are others who value the label because it may provide a sense of control over the illness as more can be learned about its treatment, causes, and outcome. With depression, I´m not convinced that this is true since the outcome of it as an illness usually is not good.

But look for that in MORE depression posts - coming soon to a blog near you!

People Pleasing Syndrome

people pleasing syndrome (noun) : the effort one goes through merely to become a doormat
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Disclaimer: "People Pleasing Syndrome" is not something that either I or my therapist could claim I have (or even have knowledge of). I'm sure that he would say I'm more likely to have "People Pissing Off Syndrome" and he wouldn't be entirely wrong there. But that's another blog posting.

I wasn't even sure that this was a psychological disorder until I saw that it already had been published as such in more than several books such as:

- The Disease to Please: Curing the People-Pleasing Syndrome

- Too Nice for Your Own Good: How to Stop Making 9 Self-Sabotaging Mistakes

- When I Say No, I Feel Guilty: How to Cope, Using the Skills of Systematic Assertive Therapy

Background: I've been away this month and have had sporadic access to the Internet; hence my lack of October posts. Despite being away, the only comments I've had to the blog were somewhat negative. One person asking about my "missing voice" and another looking for something a bit more cheery.

Post: Rather than risk needing more therapy in trying to please my apparently very small readership base, I'm going to stick with what I've got and improve upon that. As for a response to my small but vocal readers, that will be in the aforementioned "People Pissing Off" post!

Depression - part 2

reality (noun) : the thing for people who can't handle drugs
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So says Lily Tomlin, anyway.

Depression

anti-depressant (noun) : the pill that keeps one optimistic about one's life
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Of course, after common unhappiness comes depression. Some embrace it alone, simply as a fact of life; others drag everyone around down with them as a part of life.

Freud believed that depression involved loss and the guilt and self-criticism related to that loss, but that doesn't explain all types and forms of depression. (And since his goal was simply "common unhappiness" - a concept depressing in itself - I'm not sure how much weight I give to this.)

Speaking of depressing, I read a great quote about the unexamined life - although it might not be worth living, the examination itself might take the place of living.

Now if that's not enough to stop therapy, I don't know what is.

Common Unhappiness - part 2

common unhappiness (noun) : 1. ordinary sadness, as opposed to hysterical misery; 2. an acceptable level of misery; see also, Dante's first rung of hell
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According to Dr. Freud there is an acceptable level of unhappiness for humans. I think this is a therapist's way of justifying his/her inability to really "cure" someone through talk therapy. This idea goes back to my earliest posting and the reasons for ending my own therapy.

But Freud's assessment is a brilliant business model for psychotherapy. Like the elected official who says there is an "acceptable level of corruption" in politics or the oilman who says there is an "acceptable level of pollution" in drilling, this self-serving explanation prevents the examination (and therefore the possibility) of eliminating unhappiness by making it part of our DNA.

No wonder people drink!